Before I left for New York, my mum phoned to ask where I was. I told her I was in an airport, about to get on a plane to New York. Slightly confused, she said 'Oh OK, well be safe. Call me when you get back. Don't talk to any strangers!' To which I replied, 'I'll call you when I'm back. Obviously I'm going to talk to strangers!! Anyway, see ya!'
I only wish I'd listened.
You see, day two in New York, looking for somewhere to eat, a man offers his help (we must have been sticking out like sore thumbs). We told him we were just looking for some food, and he said that he was going to this great cafe around the corner. He seemed nice enough, so we trotted along with our new friend Brett to find this place. Along the way, talking to this him, it transpired that he was from Gants Hill! A tiny little place, where coincidentally (or not as the case may be) I am from! He knew The Ting Tings. I thought this guy was alright, especially as I shared his ghetto upbringing. I thought we were two peas in a pod. Two fish from Gangsta Hill in a new, big pond.
We reached the cafe and sat down to eat. Bear in mind, this whole time I was miserably hungover. Anyway, as the conversation moved on to how he'd moved to America to pursue acting, he made several references to the changing world. Philly innocently asked what he meant by this 'changing world.' And that was it. This is where it began. To cut a two hour conversation short, I shall try and sum up what followed:
Brett believed that aliens existed, and believed that when they take over, they will 'treat us like royalty'
Brett thought the earth was hollow
Brett was adamant that we have been time travelling since the 1950's (although could not tell me if it was into the past or future...)
Brett was convinced that the Vietnam War was a conspiracy theory invented by the American government to distract people from the unusually high amount of paranormal activity around at that time
Brett believed that the world would end in 2012
Brett said his girlfriend could speak to extra terrestrials
Brett thought that the ocean was powerful enough to power all electricity, and that we were paying unnecessarily for energy
Brett did not believe in coincidences (this tripped me out because when we realised we were both from Gants Hill, he was not surprised in the slightest, but I was freaking out)
Brett was a member of a cult
Brett hated any sort of media, including books, magazines and the Internet
Brett has a Facebook, a Myspace and a Youtube account
After he started talking, I could not believe it. Anything Philly or I tried to counter his ridiculous claims with, he would just dismiss without even listening. Half way through, I had to go to the toilet to be sick. Mainly because of my hangover, but also a lot because of the crap he was talking. He had swallowed a million different ideas and shat them out as one massive turd. Perhaps the worst part was, that this all happened on April Fools. I thought it was a prank at first, alas Ashton Kutcher was no where to be seen. This was real life.
Here's a video of Brett:
I guess mum was right. Never talk to strangers. Especially ones from Gants Hill.
I only wish I'd listened.
You see, day two in New York, looking for somewhere to eat, a man offers his help (we must have been sticking out like sore thumbs). We told him we were just looking for some food, and he said that he was going to this great cafe around the corner. He seemed nice enough, so we trotted along with our new friend Brett to find this place. Along the way, talking to this him, it transpired that he was from Gants Hill! A tiny little place, where coincidentally (or not as the case may be) I am from! He knew The Ting Tings. I thought this guy was alright, especially as I shared his ghetto upbringing. I thought we were two peas in a pod. Two fish from Gangsta Hill in a new, big pond.
We reached the cafe and sat down to eat. Bear in mind, this whole time I was miserably hungover. Anyway, as the conversation moved on to how he'd moved to America to pursue acting, he made several references to the changing world. Philly innocently asked what he meant by this 'changing world.' And that was it. This is where it began. To cut a two hour conversation short, I shall try and sum up what followed:
Brett believed that aliens existed, and believed that when they take over, they will 'treat us like royalty'
Brett thought the earth was hollow
Brett was adamant that we have been time travelling since the 1950's (although could not tell me if it was into the past or future...)
Brett was convinced that the Vietnam War was a conspiracy theory invented by the American government to distract people from the unusually high amount of paranormal activity around at that time
Brett believed that the world would end in 2012
Brett said his girlfriend could speak to extra terrestrials
Brett thought that the ocean was powerful enough to power all electricity, and that we were paying unnecessarily for energy
Brett did not believe in coincidences (this tripped me out because when we realised we were both from Gants Hill, he was not surprised in the slightest, but I was freaking out)
Brett was a member of a cult
Brett hated any sort of media, including books, magazines and the Internet
Brett has a Facebook, a Myspace and a Youtube account
After he started talking, I could not believe it. Anything Philly or I tried to counter his ridiculous claims with, he would just dismiss without even listening. Half way through, I had to go to the toilet to be sick. Mainly because of my hangover, but also a lot because of the crap he was talking. He had swallowed a million different ideas and shat them out as one massive turd. Perhaps the worst part was, that this all happened on April Fools. I thought it was a prank at first, alas Ashton Kutcher was no where to be seen. This was real life.
Here's a video of Brett:
I guess mum was right. Never talk to strangers. Especially ones from Gants Hill.
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